The Five Stars Folks

Saturday, September 11, 2021

Lately, I've been thinking and observing people around me. Some people are shining in their own way that makes me adore them. I saw similarities between those people. They have particular characters that I really like. Characters I would like to have in the next 5-10 years.

I called them the Five Stars Folks. They tend to have at least 2 of characters I mentioned below:

Devoted to their family.
Family relationships are the hardest. We got lots of wounds from our family. I identify family as parents, siblings, and close relatives. They can easily hurt you and you can hurt them. They have direct access to your vulnerabilities. Those are reasons why maintaining a healthy relationship with them is hard.

The Five Stars Folks have certain qualities that make them able to deal with those family dynamics. They know how to show up for their family in a way that will not burn themselves. They know how to make boundaries that keep them from unnecessary conflict. They also know how to mend the broken relationships with their family.

I highly value this quality because I think this one is the hardest. There are a lot of uncontrolled situations within the family. And I think the way people show up or deal with their family issues will reflect how they will show up to important people in their life.

Passionate to their hobbies.
I easily admire people who have hobbies. They are busy with things they enjoy the most. I think it is a very sexy quality. These people usually know how to have fun. They tend to be responsible for their own happiness. They know how to make themselves happy. They put time and energy into their joy. They have a certain energy that makes their eyes lighten up every time they talk about their favourite things. That really is adorable.

They keep learning about many things in life.
The Five Stars Folks enjoy and dedicate their life to learning things. It can be through books, movies, songs, arts, or anything they like. It can also come from people they meet. They are able to learn things from other people. They take time to understand people.

I also like those who are actively learning about themselves. The self concept is not constant. It keeps changing but is also stable in some ways. Being able to learn about these dynamics is complicated but some people can actually do it. I think because of this, they will be able to be honest with themselves.

Those who aren't perfect and strong enough to show their vulnerabilities.

Some Five Stars Folks are not perfect and they know it. They know their flaws and struggles. They are honest to themselves. They are open to trustworthy people about their vulnerabilities. It is highly related to their self-esteem. They are okay for not being perfect. They are human.

Dalai Lama once said ‘The more honest you are, the more open, the less fear you will have because there’s no anxiety about being exposed or revealed to others. So, I think that the more honest you are, the more self-confident you will be . . .’. This quality is hard to achieve. I wanna congratulate people who already have this core value.

They are kind, care, and compassionate.
They are kind to themselves and compassionate to their inner child. They are also kind to others. They work with compassion in many aspects in their life. They are aware of their surroundings. They reach out and are willing to listen. Isn’t it amazing that people can be kind, care, and compassionate? Again, they are adorable.

They are living in this world not only for themselves but also take their time serving others. They have empathy and are willing to share their resources with others.

People who are able to identify and communicate their needs or feelings.
Ok maybe this is the hardest. Some people are really good at it though. They have learned to identify their feelings and needs. They acknowledge it. They respect their self, that they are valid in any form they had in the past and in their current self.

People who know how to set boundaries.
Oh common, this one also is the hardest in our culture. We tend to say yes even though we want to say no. Instead of setting boundaries, people choose to avoid or later be resentment. Some people are easily ghosting others instead of setting boundaries. However, the Five Stars Folks are willing to take a harder step to walk through difficult conversations to set their boundaries. That's really awesome!

***

All of these sounds too perfect but I actually have met a couple of Five Stars Folks.

Well, I am hoping that gradually I can have those qualities as well. It's a long process. However, it has been a nice experience to see real people who have those qualities. It makes me think that those qualities are achievable even though it will take some time to be good at it.

I can't thank you enough for those who have become the Five Stars Folks. Their achievement has become a light to the world. It shines at least to their surroundings and to me. Still, they are usually humble about it and willing to share their process. It’s been fun to connect with them.

Have a good life.


Love,
Diny

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